Tick, Tock, Tick, Tock

That would be the sound my mind is making as every day until my Duodenal Switch surgery passes. It would be funny, except for the part where I can't sleep. And dammit, but I need my sleep!

It's gotten so bad that two nights ago I was so exhausted from previous nights of next to no sleep that I not only slept through the alarm clock when it went off for The Husband to get up, but I also slept through him kissing me before he went into the kitchen to get his stuff together and almost slept completely through him kissing me goodbye! Aaack! (Although, I must admit that it is really, really nice to be awoken by the love of your life sweetly kissing you and stroking your hair. Aaahhh!)

I'm usually the person who is wide awake ten minutes before the alarm is set to go off, no matter what time, so being this dead to the world because of exhaustion is something totally new for me. No matter how tired I am (and I'm always tired lately it seems) my mind just cannot relax for a single moment. We go to bed after an exhausting day, and while The Husband is out cold, I'm lying there with my eyes closed and mind a-whirling for hours on end, it seems. Which means that I am constantly feeling like putting my head down on my desk and taking a nap. (I did that yesterday after my comatose morning. Shhhhh! Thank God for the new cubicle that I'm in!)

As a result, I am consuming more caffiene than ever in the form of sodas and coffee - and the combination of sugar and caffene buzz and then the abrupt crashes from coming off of the stimulants is making me cranky both in body and attitude. My acid reflux is killing me every day, and I am becoming more and more snappy when something annoys me.

I think it's time to see the doctor and get a prescription for Ambien or something like that. I also need to start back on the occasional Prozac because I know that my hormones are going to go completely ape-shit when I have surgery and all that estrogen is released from those fat cells. I really don't feel like snapping and committing an axe murder just because somebody changes the channel on the TV to something I don't like, so I consider this a pre-emptive strike at saving my marriage and preventing me from doing some jail time over something really unnecessary. Stripes just aren't my thing, you know? They totally make you look fatter than you are, and Lord knows I don't need anymore of THAT going on.

* * * * *

Well, the Farewell to Food Tour (tm Dagny) continues for me. Tomorrow, I'm going to meet my friend Amy who had the DS for lunch at one of our local Chinese eateries. This should be fun - actually seeing how much she eats five years out from this thing. While I'm able to indulge my tastebuds with Crab Rangoons and Orange Chicken. Mmmmm!

Also, I just ordered four of Lou Malnati's deep dish pizzas to be shipped here tomorrow. The Husband and I LOVE Lou Malnati's pizza, but let's face it. We can't afford to fly to Chicago on a regular basis to satiate our tastebuds. So, it's going to come to us. I'm going to savor every last bite, dammit. Chinese for lunch and Lou Malnati's for dinner. There's about five pounds gained for the day right there! Aaack! But it'll taste ever so good!

And next year at this time, when I've lost 100 pounds or so, I'm going to order another pizza from Lou Malnati's, and we're going to eat it in celebration, because life with the DS is going to be so much better than life as it is now. I can't wait for this new life to begin.